Back and Then Again – 4 months in the making

It has been a long time since I last wrote anything at all...

It was months ago when I last logged an entry, but of all time, why start now?

Let’s just say writing is therapeutic for me and above all else, it is of utmost importance that I keep my communication skills intact. Now that I am on holiday and finally have the time to indulge in some authoring, I should make good use of time.

As a start, perhaps I should just introduce this blog again and all of its contents, after all, my blog is non-personal as much as it is personal. We live in a world of paradoxes and this is but one of them. Whatever I write here are definitely my own work and opinion but against the trend of other blogs, readers will barely find any traces of my life here of all places. I write to express. So what I mean by this blog being ‘non-personal as much as it is personal’ is this; whatever is covered in this blog will relate to my psychological existence more than the physical experience. There is no clear line which separates the two, especially since both the mind and body are linked and what I think would have to be caused by a physical experience before I even think about it, but just to reiterate, I am more concerned about expressing what is on my mind more than simply recounting the incident.

After five months I guess it is best to recollect and introspect whatever happened in this period of time. Aside from my fantastic albeit short trip to Perth, my life these past five months revolves around National University of Singapore (NUS).

Up until now, I have finished my first semester of a new phase in life and I guess I am still struggling to cope, making adjustments here and there. Here is the list of the adjustments that I have had to make:
1. Getting used to calling a 9 metre-square room my house.
2. Getting used to the bell-curve system in tabulating results.
3. Getting used to my new found freedom (the freedom to be an asshole or an angel).
4. Getting used to what it really means to be an engineer and of all cases, a chemical engineer in NUS.

Of all these adjustments, the one that I am concerned with are the last two. Freedom has always been a confusing word which is yet another paradox of this world. If we champion freedom that much, one can only wonder why there are laws at all. That though, is not my concern for now, for all I care, I actually believe the world would be better off in a chaotic system. It would be quite interesting to see people fight among themselves using the word ‘freedom’. Back to my UNI experience though, freedom is truly something that is new and I am still exploring its boundaries, putting one paw forward but always wary and vigilant, because a fall here would be costly, more than I can afford.

The best thing about UNI for me is the many windows of opportunities that it offers. If there is any one thing that you want to learn other than your academic pursuits, UNI is the best place to do it. The various clubs that you can join is something. While you will be spoilt for choices, there is no denying that at least one of these clubs will attract your interest and provide a chance to learn something new, whether it is a skill or knowledge.

UNI for me is the last bastion before I have to discard all my childish innocence and behaviours in exchange for a solemn demeanour taken by working adults. Thus, it is an experience that is worth savouring. Test new stuff, do all sorts of stuff. Be an asshole, throw your books aside and let the devil in you manifest. Considering that there are no discipline masters around and you are accountable for your own actions, UNI is the best time to skip classes and let yourself enjoy being ‘above’ the law for once.

UNI is the last place where you can experience and experiment with new stuff and of all places, UNI is definitely not a place for you to study. As much as a degree matters, frankly speaking it is just a slip of paper. If your life is all about books and dollars, sure go ahead and study your life away. It is your choice after all. For those who believe that life is more than about earning big bucks, that life is about having a goal, that life is worth enjoying outside work, UNI is a place for you to have fun. At this juncture though, I guess I have to state that considering that there is a spectrum of people of all walks of life from the nerds to the bastards in UNI, while you can play hard, you have to study hard as well to earn your keep in this institution.

Thus far, I am still trying to throw my books aside, but still, competition is tough in chemical engineering I guess so while I still can enjoy life in my first year, I should try to be as much of an asshole as possible before the chance runs out and before I know, I am out of UNI, expelled into the working world.

Being in a competitive course is something that I have never really thought about. Even my choice of course was random and uninformed and at best, I can only say that I chose chemical engineering because I can. I guess that is the most difficult thing for me in UNI – balancing my time. Considering that I am an ‘engineer’ I should be more interested in scientific stuff. To the contrary though, I realise that the module I like best is the Arts language module French 1.

Now that I am inside though, there is no getting out. There is no point aiming to be the best because I have no intention to further my academic pursuits. I am more concerned about adding value to my life in terms of the skills that I can learn. After little thought but decisively supportive of what I want, I have decided that I would just hit the minimum grade allowable and have fun outside my studies.

Entering UNI has changed the way I think, especially about the structure of your life in the future. While a year ago I thought that everybody would graduate and end up working one way or another, now I believe that there are better things to do than work your way to your death. You have a life, make good use of it and do something special instead of taking the same old route taken by everyone else. After all isn’t variety is the spice of life?
Find a meaning in what you do and most of all enjoy it.

Indonesia (watching STARDUT, a variant of MAMAMIA)
28/12/07

The Science of The SECRET

One is an elaborately designed book with an elegant imprint of a wax seal printed on the cover, giving an impression of sacredness. The other is a simple book with a plain cover bearing the title of the book as well as the author’s name against a background of solid gold pieces with a small image of gold coins stacked on top of each other at the bottom right corner.

After a long wait, I’ve finally finished reading both books since I first bought them almost 4 months ago. Anyway, the titles are The Secret and The Science of Getting Rich. Naturally though, this self-help category is not my kind of book but well I chanced upon an offer 4 months ago, selling these 2 books as a bundle and based on my friend’s recommendation and what I gathered going around in the news back then, the books are worth my money. To be exact though, the first time I bought the ‘bundle’, I’ve never heard of the latter. The Secret literally overshadowed its counterpart I guess and all my focus was initially riveted to the more elaborate book. Even until a week ago before I started reading The Science of Getting Rich, all my attention was still entrenched with The Secret.

Just this evening after I finished The Science of Getting Rich, a word floated to the surface of my consciousness and unexpectedly, the word is ‘plagiarism’. Considering that I first read The Secret before The Science of Getting Rich, I might have been affected by the new information still fresh in my head and thus, it is more than possible that I coin theories that are only slightly similar as synonymous and one. At this point, I am quite aware that whatever I’ve written is vague at best and you are wondering which author is copying who. Now, I’ll add in a piece of information – the author of The Science of Getting Rich, Wallace D. Wattles died almost a century ago.

If he was still alive, it would be more than tempting to assume that Wallace would have sued Rhonda Brynes. Then again though, I would concede to the fact that while their contents are by far and large similar, their methods of expressing their ideas are more suited to their respective eras. The Secret wouldn’t fit in Wallace’s era as much as Wallace’s masterpiece is no longer attractive in our milieu. In fact, Wallace’s book has an obvious and uncovered deference to Jesus or the presence of a God. The Secret though is a watered down version. You will still get the feeling that the author is trying to preach religion but Rhonda is aware that there are people like the atheists as well and minimal reference to God is made. The best part of it all is that she is aware that God is relative to everyone. Even an atheist can have a God called Reason.

As for the contents, both books pretty much contain the same basic principles that are perhaps decorated with different examples. What is different between the two is the relevance with which the books are written. While one is more concerned with amassing riches, the other is more all-rounded, encompassing the different aspects of life such as health, relationships, jobs.

So what exactly is the content? In my own words, against the ‘Like Theory’ of the two books, I will call it – be positively positive. And as I would say, ‘I am not a pessimist, just an opportunist. Not an optimist, but a pragmatist’. No matter what the situation, life still goes on. Have a goal in life, have faith in yourself and everything else will take care of itself.

Having a goal is important because it is like the captain of the ship. Your goal sets the next destination of your ship, it determines what you are going to do. A goal though need not be too complicated or long-term. A simple short-term goal will suffice. A house is not built overnight; it is built over months, years with phases being completed one after another, slowly but surely. You can only do what you can today, not in the past or in the future. You might plan for the future, but what if the future never comes? Do with your best what you do today to build a better tomorrow, instead of doing what you do today to fit into the future that you dream for it might not manifest itself.

Have faith in yourself, because your potential is endless. If you have tried your best and the outcome is far worse than your expectation, can you really call that your best? Your best is not a quantity, it is a window of endless possibilities. Your best is being the best.

All in all though, the ideas provided by both books are useful for everyone. However, neither book should be strictly taken as a guide to life for each person will eventually have to find his/her own way. Sure ideas are there for you to learn and adopt, but you are a character of your own. Choose only principles which are aligned with your nature. Do not try to mould a new you trying to fit 100% with the book because there really is no one panacea. There is no one-size fits all approach. Take the two authors featured here as an example. They used the same principles but each expressed them slightly different from each other. You can have the same theory of life but interpretations will vary widely from one person to another.

The two books are worth the money but only if they are read and compared with. Only through comparison can you understand the different perspectives that people have over the similar theory. In fact, it would be best to read other books of the topic by other authors to compare their different perspectives. Then again, there is no point to be obsessed over a simple theory. The best thing that you can do for yourself, is to know what is best for yourself. Right?


Indonesia, watching MAMAMIA
27/12/07

A Trip to the Wilderness

Here comes Day 2:

Where we went I had already forgotten. Anyway though on the 2nd day I had the company of my brother as my tour guide. Basically, we went to an area that is an hour's drive away from the residential areas. As secluded as it is, its the perfect place to grow fruits. Yes we were actually visiting farms. Just a pity that the current winter season is not the time for harvesting. As shown in the pictures, the trees are stripped bare. No trace of leaves at all. The usual harvesting season is between March or April till the end of June. What do they grow? Quite a number of fruits. Persimmons, pears, apples etc..







The visit though, was just an additional stop to the true destination. After the brief visit, we continued further to the Wungong suburb to see the Wungong reservoir.

If you look at the pictures, well, its a picture of our lunch. We had a fantastic lunch outing out in the open by the reservoir amid the freezing gale. I have tried BBQ in Hong Kong, Singapore and now Perth. I must say though this is by far the most special one of all. The pits here are free for all to use and what is better is that the grill is heated by LPG, so there is no need to build a fire using a mountain of charcoal pieces. In a few minutes, the food were getting heated and we kept close to the pit, which doubly acts as a pit and also as a heater. BBQ-ing out there in the afternoon in the middle of winter is cool really. Its not romantic, but hey couples out there, try BBQ-ing out on your own. Just the 2 of you. Its going to be special.

On with the story, we continued surveying the reservoir, with my brother giving me lessons on structural foundations. I had to recall the physics that I lost 8 months ago and it was unthinkable that what I had learned can be put to use so practically in the structure of the dam.

Now that I've sort of an additional knowledge, reservoir has become a cool place, a place of structural and natural wonder.

Anyone wondering what kind of apple I have in my hand? That is actually an ice cream. Peach flavoured to be exact, with a crusty layer and an inner chocolate core which seems so realistically true. Bon apetite~

Swan Bells Tower

Now that I am in my last phase of my holiday in Perth and that I am at least able to post some pictures, let me just share the delights of my travel for the past one week since I've arrived here.

The house has apparently undergone some serious dilapidation due to a lack of care. To put it simply, the house looks more like a storehouse. However lets not delay my story.

Ok, so the weather here is comfy cold. I am not too sure how cold it is but last I heard its something like 16 degrees celsius, pretty much like when I went to Hong Kong last December. Good thing is, you'll never sweat, but its very dry around here.

Day 1 :
Pretty much spend the whole time in the city. Nothing much has changed since I last came 3 years ago. Shops still close early, and people are going about with their stuff in a semi-serious attitude.

With my sis as the tour guide, we made a visit to the Swan Bells Tower.
Why it got its name is pretty apparent I guess. I don't know about you people, but that brown coloured covering looks like the swan's wings to me and that light blue tower is the neck.

What is inside? A lesson about Perth's history and bells, a whole range of them and hence its name Swan Bells Tower.

Its only 6 storeys high actually, but once on top, believe me your head will be swimming. What got me when I stepped out of the lift wasn't the height but rather, the metal girdles that pave the floor which have spaces wide enough for a mobile phone to slip through. So, the rather 'holey' girdles you stand on six floors up is really a daunting sight, especially when you don't know how strong it is. The platform with the girdles is supported only by thick wires. Scary.

Nonetheless, once atop the platform, you command a breathtaking sight of the Swan River, the city, and the residential suburbs across the river. Its quite a scenery really, a city that is leisurely yet orderly on one side juxtaposed with the greeneries of lawns and trees of houses at the other end of the bank.

A nice place really, a good place to spend your time looking blankly around while letting your mind relax.

---> Me squinting against the bright afternoon sun atop the tower.

If anyone noticed at all, the picture on top is actually a reflection of the 2 of us and not a picture of real physical bodies. See, we had to zoom out so that we can take a picture of something other than our faces (like the pic to the left) and my arm is too short to provide for the distance. Thus the mirror gives a good image. =)

The Bridge to Childhood Innocence

It was early dawn. A boy put on his sneakers, watched calmly as his father drove off before he embarked on a jog. Along the trees he jogged, the road he past, before finally returning to his house drenched in sweat. He took off his torn sneakers and threw them aside and entered the house for breakfast. At first glance, this boy looks like any other normal boy but a lot can be drawn from the way he ignored his sisters working up a fuss over his sweaty body, from the way he stared intently on the ant crawling across the table, from the way he wore his old and worn sneakers with relish about his life.

That is the start of the movie I watched 3 days ago. The Bridge to Terabithia. Having seen the trailer only once, I actually had no idea what the movie was about and was pretty much inclined to dismiss the movie as boring and a waste of time after having watched the first ten minutes of the show. As the story progresses though, I grew to like how the characters were being developed how lying dormant behind the simple lives of 2 young kids are the wondrous and creative imagination of adolescents. Sitting down in that comfortable seat of the theatre, I watched the show as an 18-year old but with every passing second I grew younger, shrinking in size becoming a 10 or 11 year old kid constantly drawing parallels between what is going on on the screen and my own childish thoughts and adventures talking to imaginary friends and fighting imginary foes or monsters a decade ago.

Yes the theme of the movie is the same as Pan's Labyrinth, about the fantasy of an imagined realm by growing kids but that is about all the similarities that the 2 movies share. The Bridge to Terabithia is certainly not as mature nor realistically cruel as Pan's Labyrinth in the portrayal of the characters and the plot of the former is definitely more cheery and light than the solemn and dark atmosphere that the latter provides. The former is more suited as a movie for children, encouraging them to engage in creativity, creating worlds or creatures of their own in which they can find solace, a safe haven where they are free to express themselves without restraint and indulge in fantasies without being confronted with the pains of learning how to cope with the harsh realities and responsibilities of life. The latter though, seems more like a message to adults, reminding them that in every child lies an innocent soul who must be treated with care lest the fragile nature of it be broken.

The Bridge to Terabithia is a family show, one with a lot of different meanings to those who are watching it. For the children, it may simply be fun, for the parents, this movie allows them to travel through time back into their own childhood, reminiscing the past with joy.

For the kids who are about to watch the show, just relax and enjoy the carefreeness with which the protagonists express themselves when together in their own realm. For the adults who think you are too serious for a kid's show, remember that you were once a kid as well and kept locked somewhere within you is a pure youthful soul who wants to be let out. Keep an open mind, take a deep breath and relax. This is one of those rare movies which soothes your confused minds. Allow yourself to fall into the embrace of The Bridge to Terabithia, and feel its magic for it will help you erect the bridge to your very own innocent childhood memories.

Measuring progress

Looking back on the previous post, there is that one thing that I had written which got me thinking. Thinking in the usual abstract manner that my incomprehensible mind works.

Previously I had written '....setting the barrier that separates the developed and the developing.' There is nothing wrong with the phrase itself but I realise that in writing that comment I've made an assumption - that developed are neat and tidy while the developing are dirty and messy. Me being the usual bull-headed me, I asked, 'why does being developed have to be chained to the orderly structure that cities often take?'

Personally, I've always had an inclination towards leaving things in their natural state. Thus, it is not surprising that I view development with disdain.

Why do we have to judge development by the turning of fertile soil into an arid land? Or by the metamorphosis of greeny foliage into the dull lifeless colour of concrete and steel making up the skyscrapers? Or, the most confounding and fundamental question of all, why do we associate development with money?

Perhaps, just perhaps greed made us forget that humans are sentient creatures. I thought that the world would be much better off if we measure development in terms of happiness. Sure, feelings are relative to occasions and to people themselves, but this is the one thing that definitely makes more sense as a development-meter than the destruction of our surroundings for money.

I have a vision(chose to neglect dream because it sounds too cliche. =) *bow down in respect to Martin Luther King Jr.*). I have a vision of a world where people are free by their own choices to lead lives as farmers, fishermen or lawyers or white collared professionals, whatever it is that they want. Sounds pretty much like what we have now? Continue reading. But I also envision countries that are unique in their own characteristics without having to bow down to the threats of development. How about imagining one country say America, which is filled by tall skyscrapers living beside another country, Venezuela which is covered by trees without a hint, trace or touch of technology on it? They need not be neighbours, neither must they take the appearance of the 2 extremes of development and under-development, but the point is they do not need to follow the current standards for development.

Alternatively, how about setting aside a section of the land in every country to be labelled as a 'haven' or 'sanctuary' for people who wish to be free of the mess and stress of living in a developed world. Given such a choice, I honestly prefer living in a jungle with tigers and snakes as companions than living in the skull-cracking chaos of the city.

I envision a developed world. A world dotted with different shades and hues of soothing green and dull gray on it. This world is developed not because the gray overshadows the green, but because the 2 colours hang in balance and the progress marker for development is happiness not avarice.

The ensemble of honking cars and clattering pans

I've been eating a lot lately, either voluntarily or involuntarily.

Why, just yesterday I chased an abang(Singapore's equivalent of uncle used in that informal tone when calling to peddlers) for 100 metres or so from the shop just to buy some food. What food? This abang sells gorengan, otherwise known as fried food. Fried bananas, fried tofus, fried tempes etc. Simply delicious~

In any case I was reminded of an article by an expat living in Jakarta criticising the peddlers for orchestrating traffic jams with their pans and bubbling boiling oil as instruments.

Although I have to agree that these roadside peddlers are a nuisance, I recognise their worth for setting the barrier that separates the developed and the developing. The sight of a road being choked by peddlers settling down with small bottles of oil lamps can never be found elsewhere and in fact the only other place where I've seen a similar scenery is in Bangkok. I am not supportive of their actions, especially when I am the one getting caught in a traffic jam(literally every few seconds) but considering their importance as progress markers, I am pleased to be part of the mess and raucousness created by the ensemble of honking cars and clattering pans.

Here in the still-developing Jakarta, people are ignorant and in their ignorance they find bliss. My childhood was spent consuming junk food of all sizes and shapes by the road side(small wonder I was overweight when I first set foot on Singapore) and I would have continued indulging myself with the oily food had I not known the words 'trans-fats', 'stroke', 'myocardiac infarction', or any other words that describes fats as evil substances for that matter. Me aside though, tell the general populace that they should cut down on fats and they would look at you as if you had two antennas hanging from your head. Tell the abang that recycling used oil is carcinogenic and you will hear him complain about the rising oil prices.

I am not inclined to become a junk-food addict yet again, but since its the way of life here, there is no point in me resisting it. I indulge in the road-side food as much as anyone else does but very much more in moderation in terms of frequency. Despite appearance, and of course health concerns, some of my favourite dishes find their roots by the road side behind the cart of some peddler. The juicy gorengan is definitely in the list. The spicy gado-gado. Then there is es campur(Singapore's equivalent of ice kacang although they are not in any way similar other than the ice shavings)and a number of other desserts for those with sweet tooth, cakes and martabaks(totally different from the Indian version) for the flour lovers and not to miss out my all-time favourite - the piquant barbecued corns dipped in chili(I often promise myself to try out making my own corn-with-chili whenever there is a barbecue session. But I am still waiting for the day it happens)! With the myriad varieties of food available for the hungry, these peddlers and the practice of binging are actually quite impressed and deep rooted in the Indonesian culture.

There are restaurants for the rich, but then again there are the peddlers who are always waiting for patrons by the road side for the poor. Their food may be cheap, ugly in appearance and unhealthy but in terms of taste, they are able to hold their own and are no less delicious than the restaurants.

Indonesians, you are special. Special not because you are developed but on the contrary, special because you are struggling to advance. Special not because you are 'cultured and well-bred' but because you are part of the ensemble of honking cars and clattering pans!